As a wife for almost 20 years, I’ve been given plenty of opportunities to see that there are times when I have a very high opinion of my husband, and find it easy to follow his leadership. However, there have also been times when I’ve doubted his ability to lead me and our family. In realizing this, I’ve prayed some specific prayers and have come such a long way in being able to confidently say that I know my husband is being led of God and is the right leader for our home.
“Mine eye affecteth mine heart.”
How I view my husband is how I think about him. I need God to help my thinking every day, in one area or another!
There are times when my husband makes decisions that cause me to wonder if he’s right.
As humans, we generally want things our own way. The way that we think would be best. Most of the time, I’m glad that I don’t have to ultimately make the big decisions for our family, and I’m happy to allow my husband to have that responsibility. I’m also glad that he takes that responsibility very seriously!
It gets tricky when I really disagree with his viewpoint. That is where submitting comes in.
Submission really only happens when I disagree!
In our home, we decided a long time ago, that we will follow the Biblical pattern laid out in Ephesians 5:23:
“For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church…”
This means, when my husband and I do not agree on something, he will ultimately make the final decision! That’s the time when I will need to be careful to think right. That’s the time to pray something kind of unusual: that God would magnify my husband in my eyes.
Magnify isn’t a word that we use very often in our language today in this sense. The dictionary defines ‘magnifying’ as elevating or raising in estimation. It’s the opposite of the word ‘despise’, which is to have the lowest opinion of someone. Just as a magnifying glass helps my physical vision, God helps my mental outlook.
In the Bible we see how God influenced how people thought about their leader by “magnifying” that person in their eyes! The first example was Joshua, leader of the children of Israel.
“And the LORD said unto Joshua, This day will I begin to magnify thee in the sight of all Israel, that they may know that, as I was with Moses, so I will be with thee.” (Joshua 3:7)
God did the same thing for Solomon.
“…the Lord magnified Solomon exceedingly in the sight of all Israel…”
(1 Chronicles 29:25)
It doesn’t say that God made those leaders different. He just changed how their people viewed them, and this affected their ability to follow well. God is for order. He blesses when our homes run “decently and in order” (1 Corinthians 14:40).
I want to have a strong, long-lasting marriage. I want to finish well.
“Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof…” (Ecclesiastes 7:8)
Sometimes my eyes (& my thinking) just need a little help. It’s God that does the magnifying.
Here is my prayer- Lord, help my mind to have the proper opinion of my husband. Help me to see him as the gift you’ve given to me. Give me charity towards him. Show me evidence that he is being led by you, and help me to recognize when you are showing me these things. Magnify my husband in my eyes.